Institute: Days Twenty-Four through Thirty

There is so much I want to write, to express. I want to shout at my monitor until you could hear me through the subsequent reverberations of your computer desk. But I have 2 more days of instruction time and I can't let my students down.

We've got big goals to meet, people.

Institute: Days Fifteen through Twenty-Three

About 8 more lessons to teach. About 8 more chances for my kids to learn something.

I would not have believed you if you told me before institute that teachers need to manage their time down to the minute to actually be effective. Now I'm writing action plans that have me allotting 11 minutes to writing this blog entry.

I am making natural selection puzzles for my students to complete tomorrow. Today I had them reading an article on Mendel's genetics laws. Next week I am going to wish them good luck as I vacate the campus forever. I hope I helped.

I miss the bay area.

We were looking at posters that teachers made to track student progress and help invest students in hard work. It looks like making and updating colorful progress trackers and posters will be my number one hobby outside of the classroom come next fall.

One of the posters was centered around the quote, we build the world with our hands and hearts. I like it. Consider it stolen, whoever you are that thought it up.

Institute: Days Five through Fourteen

My future roomie scribbled into his palm with a ballpoint pen the phrase "I CAN." This reminds him of what he is capable of. For example, when he fails miserably in the classroom and sobs uncontrollably into his hands, he smudges ink all over his face.

Remembering this motion for optimism and seeing as I, too, needed to remind myself of success, I wrote my own motivational phrase on a post-it and placed it on my desk lamp.

The note reads: "Do Not Kill Yourself."

Thanks, motivational note. Thanks, institute.

I'm grading papers and realizing that on some days I don't know if students understand what I've taught because I am apparently awful at writing clear quiz questions.

I've gotten more than one look of death from my students.

I passed out on my bed the other night. I felt my eyes cross and I lost 2 hours of consciousness. I woke up in time to fill my red lunch bag and jump on the school bus.

I am slowly getting better at this. We are 25% done with the class. Maybe by halfway I will be on top of everything. My students will then have already missed out on effectively learning half the material.

And yet, my students are lucky to have me, because without me they wouldn't have a biology teacher and wouldn't be able to take the class at all.

This is one fucked-up society.

Institute: Days Three & Four

And self-doubt appears to be winning this round.

Institute: Day Two

So tired and have so much to do already. Am team-teaching biology with 3 other biology teachers at a high school in LA. Neighborhood flaunts bars on windows, classrooms decorated with graffiti. Learned the Academic Impact Model, which tells that teacher skills impact teacher actions impact student actions impact student academic progress. I drive the learning of the class with what I know and how I act. I'm trying to learn what to know and how to act.

Goal for tomorrow: eat more.

Institute: Day One

I am now all caught up to present-day. Induction was a blast, and now a recent plane ride to Long Beach and subsequent BBQ is the starting point for Institute, a month-long unit of intensive teacher training. I don't have much to add at the moment, other than I'm exhausted. The Internet here is reliable so expect daily updates from here on out.

Induction: Day Five (End)

I've arrived at the end of Induction with the same feelings that I had during Hall Staff Training:

To paraphrase a quote that was said, we cast our bread along the river so others who hunger downstream can feast. We’re simply expected to trust that our initial impact and interactions over a year [with our residents] will be enough to afford such a change at a later date, requiring inordinate amounts of confidence with the issues and with ourselves.

The rush we get—I get—from knowing our efforts possess the possibility to engender powerful change in growing minds, is amazing. The progress afforded can be so grand that it is simply worth the wait, so to speak.

Our director reminisced earlier about an inspiring moment he encountered during our Induction. At a meeting with a school district, TFA corps members were greeted by district officials and products of its education system, hand-picked students from different schools asked to meet and greet new wide-eyed teachers. Many of these students came from backgrounds that stifled motivation and achievement, be that through the effects of bad influences or simply low expectations. Yet these students standing there achieved in areas that many of their peers had not. What had happened to these students that changed their life prospects for the better?

What had been a key moment in these students' lives was their interaction with inspiring teachers, teachers that did not run away from the challenges of cultivating a college-going culture, teachers that did not forget about the innate potential of all young adults. Their teachers taught with passion, with urgency for achieving grandiose learning goals in very little time. Their teachers worked relentlessly, and demanded high expectations with respect and humility.

But what really pulled at his heartstrings, our director continued, was hearing the names of these students' inspiring teachers. He was awestruck when he recognized each and every name from his own memories--it was because the teachers they named were Teach For America corps members from years past, teachers who made indelible impressions earlier in their lives, and in turn created new opportunities for their success. The students reminded our director of how significant our work as educators is, both in the short- and long-term, and of what our TFA movement is capable of.

I'm beginning a month-long journey through training to learn how to cast my bread along the water as an educator. I can only hope to one day be able to give these opportunities to my students.